Needy

I've been at my new job for almost two months now. Two months doesn't seem like that much time, but I feel like a veteran paralegal at this point. I've done more substantive work than I had done at my previous job in the six months leading up to my departure.

I hit the ground running at my new firm. I don't think I left before 5:30 a single day my first week and was getting in a full 30 minutes earlier than I had been at my old job. They were long days. They still are. But they absolutely fly by. I love it when my work days fly by. At my former job, I used to get excited when the clock struck 3 p.m. It meant only two more hours until I could go home. Now, I often look at the clock surprised to see that 3 p.m. is long gone.

This is in no way a complaint. I love being this busy.

The thing that I've found most surprising about my new job is that I'm actually good at it. I say that only because I didn't do a lot at my last job. My tasks were those that I felt anyone could do. I didn't need any sort of special skill or training. I was doing the kind of work I had been doing when I first started. But it was three years after I started. I wasn't using my brain. And I really missed using my brain. So much so, that I often times questioned if it still worked.

That was one of the beautiful surprises of my new job. I jumped in and was able to start working and doing more complicated tasks than I had been in years. Not only was I doing what was asked of me though. I was improving upon the way that my paralegal predecessors had done things. I was contributing and making things better for the attorneys I worked with. I felt appreciated. I felt smart. And I felt needed. There is no greater feeling than I get from doing my job than feeling needed.

Tomorrow though will be a different story. There will be no question that I'm needed. Not long before I left work on Friday afternoon, I learned that as of tomorrow, I'm the only person doing my job. My fellow paralegal won't be returning to work. The most I can do is continue doing the best job I can and hope that I'll live up to my veteran title. Even if it is a title I didn't think I'd have less than two months in.